It is that time of year, my friends, my favourite season has descended upon the country.
Yesterday's downpour was an indication of the potentially soggy months to come, but the chill in the air at 5.30pm (this time is not so precise that it is only chilly at 5.30pm, obviously) makes me happy. Almost time for wrapping up in scarves, gloves and little woolly hats to sit outside and drink hot chocolate, or coffee... or push the boat out, combine the two and have a mocha with marshmellows!
The crisp autumn mornings are on their way. A bit of frost. Scraping the car in the morning. And to be honest, I can't wait. Frank's school looks beautiful in Autumn. Just as the leaves turn golden and red. And time to crack out the winter wardrobe. Trench coats, capes, leather boots. Yipee!
The saddest thing about this Autumn is that it took a 'special' event for me to notice it. An event, which in itself is quite disgusting, but very problematic.
So I had partially observed the season's change, but not enough to warrant a significant reaction, when I decided to walk my pooch - Charley Dog. After a failed attempt at having a motivational Monday morning, I needed to escape the house and get some fresh air when I finished work.
Charley Dog and I walked all over the place. She had a good sniff. A rummage in a hole. Chased a squirrel. Casual dog sort of things.
Then we walked through a wooded area. The mutt began to slow, and I grew increasingly frustrated (the result of the Monday Blues). I let her wander and mooch and I whipped out the new gadget to make a phonecall.
Frank's mobile clicks straight to voicemail. Limited coverage in Ipswich, don't you know. I leave a brief message, moaning about Monday's and the like. I hang up and turn around to see pooch squatting.
Delightful, but she has to go. I don't stalk up on her too quick, give her some privacy.
Only I leave it a little too long, and before I can get there, she's walked off the mark and left me scouring the crisp autumnal leaves for a suspicious looking... well you know.
The problem with autumn walks, is that you have to be quick on the scoop up otherwise other people on leisurely walks look at you like you are slightly deranged person peering curiously at fallen leaves.
Honestly, if I didn't spend 15 minutes trying to locate it (I did) then someone would have walked in it and trodden it through the house,then you hear the yells of obscenities, and a cacophony of... "why can't those [insert choice phrase] dog owners pick up their dogs [insert another choice word]?" and children crying (it's more often the children who kick through the leaves, but I've been known to have a good 'scuff.)
But if I pick it up (and take a stupidly long time doing so, because autumn means you have to search for the present)... I still get looked at.
It's a lose/lose situation.
Charley Dog, grow some opposable thumbs and pick up your own in future.